I hurt for a long time because of childhood sexual abuse. Now I want to provide a safe place for hurting men to connect with other survivors of sexual abuse. Talk to us. You don't have to use your real name to share your experiences or ask questions.

Anger Against Ourselves

Counselor Dr. Gordon Grose refers to a study of 17,000 people in which experts analyzed the effect of Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE). They examined ten categories, including physical and sexual abuse, and they followed their lives.

"Fifty years after those traumatic events, the study matched the person's current state of health and wellbeing against their ACE score. . . . Results revealed the strong relationship between increasing ACE scores and chronic depression in men and women in later life."[1]

Grose also stresses the correlation between increased ACE scores, increased health costs, and decreased life expectancy. "People tend to respond to early injustice with life-long self-destructive tendencies. It's as if they tell themselves, If I can't make someone else pay, my body will."[2]

The lesson for us is that the pain and anger of childhood will come out in some form—unconsciously. The more obvious way is anger at others. If we assume the results are correct, what do we do?

The answers vary for each of us, but this much is clear: We need help for those outcroppings. Too often we treat anger as something different and separate. But it's really a symptom.

[1] Tragedy Transformed by Gordon S. Grose (BelieversPress, Colorado Springs, CO: 2015, p 49–50).
[2] Ibid.


Dan said...

I'd say much damage has been done to my body.
I used to have severe stomach aches as a kid, and I can assume that most of that was a symptom of what was done to me.
Now I suffer with a moderate form of Chrone's, and rhum. arthritis, both may be in part to the abuse.
I was adopted which also complicates the diagnosis as I have no way of knowing family history.
They may be related to the trauma, and they may not I only pray the Jesus continues to heal me, and eventually healing will take place in my body as my spirit heals.

Andrew Schmutzer said...

This is a cruel reality for abuse survivors. As we heal, we also make more and more connections to to the effects of our abuse. It's only the non-abused who balk at this. The body will communicate what the mouth cannot express. Wounding is holistic, so is healing. This actually underscores the complexity of the trauma. So let's heal for the next generation--what is not transformed will be transferred. God have mercy!

Roger Mann said...

Andrew said, "The body will communicate what the mouth cannot express."

I have found this to be painfully true. Self loathing, bitterness, anger, forgiveness, self pity, it all takes it's toll. Like Bogey, said, "Maybe not now, maybe not tomorrow, but soon for the rest of your life".

There is a reason God said No to some things and Yes, do, to other things. It was not because his the ultimate buzz kill, it is for out own good. We have our choices to make and can make the wrong ones if we want but the consequences are always there. We can be forgiven, but sin, disobedience takes it's toll. We can forgive, heal and move on or we can cling to our hurt till it hurts us all over again.

I am still working on this obedience thing. It too has it's rewards I have noticed.

Just my thoughts

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