I hurt for a long time because of childhood sexual abuse. Now I want to provide a safe place for hurting men to connect with other survivors of sexual abuse. Talk to us. You don't have to use your real name to share your experiences or ask questions.

Please Believe Me

I read somewhere that the greatest fear of survivors is that others won't believe them. It took me a long time to open up to my friends because of that fear. When I did speak up I received so much kindness, it emboldened me to speak up more often. Now I have no problem telling anyone that I'm a survivor of childhood abuse.

Another fear for many of us is that people will think (or say) we made up the story about our sexual rape to get attention. I can't verify this, but a friend told me that the National Coalition Against Sexual Assault says that only about 2 percent of the reports are false.

We're not responsible for their doubts and questions. Our need to be believed is crucial to our healing and some have felt molested again because others have been skeptical or told us we were mistaken.

I need to be believed.
That's crucial to my healing.

1 comment:

Mark said...

This has been a huge fear of mine. Although no one has ever NOT believed me, I have a hard time believing myself.
I have a theory about this fear issue.
Many of us abused boys were told in one way or another that our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs did not matter or were wrong. In my case an abuser told me “the more pain you feel, the better it is”.
I developed a faulty mindset; pain – physical or emotional – was good. So I now have a hard time believing that what was done to me was bad. Even though it continues to cause me pain.
And if I have a hard time accepting the truth of my abuse, how can I NOT fear that others won’t believe me?