I hurt for a long time because of childhood sexual abuse. Now I want to provide a safe place for hurting men to connect with other survivors of sexual abuse. Talk to us. You don't have to use your real name to share your experiences or ask questions.

Flashbacks and Dreams

(This post is an excerpt from an unsolicited email from Mark and is printed with his permission.)

I recently read your book Not Quite Healed. I have always had a brief memory of sexual abuse that occurred when I was 4 or 5 years old. Two years ago I entered a Celebrate Recovery program to begin to deal with out of control porn addiction, same-sex attraction, and a host of fear and anxiety.

I began to experience flashbacks. At first I didn't understand what they were. My sponsor is an abuse overcomer and was able to get me helpful information on flashbacks.

It wasn't until reading your chapter on flashbacks and dreams that I realized you men were speaking my "language" and describing my experience.

Not only that, but I also realized that given my memories, and the additional evidence of the flashbacks, it is right for me to say that, to the best of my understanding, I was raped as a young boy.

Beginning to use that ugly word rape has brought peace. I'm no longer fighting and doubting myself. I am allowing myself to accept that I was a victim.

Thank you both for your book, for your vulnerable honesty.

Mark

1 comment:

stanw said...

I have never had flash backs but suspect rape even though as the writer said, little memory of the abuse. No doubt though that I was a victim. Thanks for sharing this.

Stan