At the end of emails to good friends, I sometimes add these words: "Be kind to [name] today." Occasionally I'll add, "[Name] is someone I like very much and deserves the kindness."
Not everyone responds to that and I don't write it to hear from them. I write the words because I mean them. I also write them because I've had to say them to Cec many, many times.
When I've messed up, said or done the wrong thing, feel low, or lonely, that's when I have to decide to be kind to myself.
How do I show myself compassion?
My words go like this: I like Cec; he needs me to support him and he deserves all the love and respect I can give him.
Be kind to yourself. Say only positive, loving thoughts to yourself. If you find yourself bordering on negative and self-condemning words, here's what I do. "Cec, I'm sorry I felt that way. You don't deserve the harsh things I've said about you. I promise you that I'll be nicer."